EP 80 – You Gotta Do the Work to Get Results – Jennifer’s Story
Show Notes
On today’s episode, we are joined by Jennifer, a participant in the Right Body for Me coaching program.
Like many women, Jennifer spent her life cycling from one diet to another, never finishing or finding “success” with any of them. But, she continued to believe that losing weight was the answer to all her struggles and always hoped that the next one would “work” and she’d feel better.
Eventually she realized that dieting wasn’t working and she started dabbling in the non-diet approach, however it didn’t seem to matter how much she learned or what programs she tried, she never found that freedom she thought she would gain by ditching diets.
In our interview, you’ll hear how one to one coaching was the thing that made the difference for Jennifer. By having someone ask the tough questions, encourage her to dig down to the core issue and hold space for her – she finally felt safe to do the work to transform her limiting beliefs about health, weight and herself.
Jennifer shares how “doing the work” has given her the freedom she’s always wanted and opened up more possibilities than she even imagined.
Mentioned in the show:
Right Body for Me – my 6 month coaching program is now open for enrollment. Using tools from CBT, you’ll explore your relationship with food, exercise, body image and health so you can leave dieting, punitive exercise and body shame behind for good! Learn more on my website at www.radiantvitality.ca/rightbodyforme
About the Host—Kim Hagle (she/her) is Certified Personal Trainer, Registered Holistic Nutritionist, Body Image Coach and founder of Radiant Vitality Wellness. Through her signature coaching program, “Right Body for Me”, she helps women heal their relationship with food and exercise while disconnecting their worth from their weight, so they can feel healthy, happy and confident in the body they have.
Want to feel good in your body without focusing on weight? Register for our free 5 day mini training course. -You’ll receive one short video and worksheet each day for 5 days that will help get started with the non-diet approach and feeling better in your NOW body! www.radiantvitality.ca/freetraining
Ready to take the next step? Visit our website to learn more about our coaching programs www.radiantvitality.ca/programs
For health professionals looking to adopt the non-diet approach in your business, visit Kim’s mentor, Stephanie Dodier’s site for free resources to get started. https://www.stephaniedodier.com
Let’s stay in touch! Kim is on Instagram and Facebook @radiantvitalitywellness.
Disclaimer. The information contained in this podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice. Always consult a health care professional about your unique needs.
Full Transcript
[00:00:00] Hey, Hey friend, how are you today? Welcome back. It’s Kim here, your host. Certified personal trainer, registered holistic nutritionist and body image code. This is episode 80 and we’ve titled this one: “you got to do the work to get results”.
[00:00:15] Now, before you think I’m talking like diet culture talk, like you got to show up and go to the gym and you got to meal plan and prep and “do the work” to get the results of weight loss, that is so not what we’re talking about today. We’re talking about doing the work on your mindset to get the resultant transformation you’re looking for in your whole life.
[00:00:39] We’re joined today on this episode by Jennifer, who is a participant in my “Right Body for Me”, coaching program. And like many women, Jennifer spent her life cycling from one diet to another. never finishing, never finding so-called success, with any of them.
[00:00:57] But she continued to believe that losing weight was the answer to all her struggles and always hope that the next one would work and she’d feel better. Eventually she realized that dieting wasn’t working anymore. And she started dabbling in the non diet approach. She started reading articles, listening to podcast, and even signing up for different courses and group coaching programs. However, she found that it didn’t seem to matter how much she learned or what programs she tried- she never found that freedom that she thought she would gain by ditching diets.
[00:01:30] So in our interview, you’re going to hear how it was doing the work on her mindset that finally made the difference for her. And for Jennifer that looked like signing up for one-on-one coaching. By having someone that she had to show up for, who would ask her the tough questions, encouraged her to dig down to the core issue and hold that space for – she finally felt safe to do the work, to transform her limiting beliefs about health and weight and herself; what her weight meant about herself.
[00:02:03] And you’ll hear her share how doing the work has given her that freedom that she’s always wanted. And it’s opened up more possibilities than she ever even imagined. So I really hope that you enjoy this interview.
[00:02:16] And before we get started, I want to let you know that my coaching program right body for me, is currently open for enrollment.
[00:02:24] This is my six month coaching container, where I support women to leave dieting, punitive exercise and body shame behind. We use tools from cognitive behavior therapy to help you explore all those thoughts and limiting beliefs that maybe you’re not even aware of yet that are keeping you on the cycle of hopping from one program to the next. And never really feeling better. It’s perfect for the woman who wants eating to be easy, who wants to feel motivated to move without needing willpower or accountability. And who wants to feel confident and comfortable in her own skin. While, it’s definitely not a weight loss program, right body for me will help you define health on your terms, and give you all that freedom, confidence and good feelings that you’ve been chasing; without all the rules restriction, willpower, guilt, and shame.
[00:03:16] So you can learn more and book a call with me on my website, where we can chat face-to-face about whether we’re a good fit to work together.
[00:03:24] All right. So let’s jump into the interview with Jennifer.
[00:03:27] Kim: Well, Hey Jennifer, welcome to the joyful movement show. I’m so excited to be chatting with you here today.
[00:03:32] Jennifer: Thank you. Thank you. I’m happy to be here.
[00:03:35] Kim: Well, great. Well, I was chatting a little bit about you in the introduction, and I know we’re going to have a really great conversation about your experience with coaching.
[00:03:46] But before we get into all the good stuff, can you just tell us a little about who you are and what things were like in your life before we met?
[00:03:54] Jennifer: Well, I am a mature woman, I suppose I could say I have been dieting and in diet culture since I was about 18. And when I think back, that’s a long number of years.
[00:04:08] Okay. And the thing was, I never finished or succeeded with any diets. I couldn’t restrict enough. I couldn’t stick to the program or plan. I would. Um, and I’d go after the next shiny object that would come along and hope that it was going to be the, the magic button or the magic pill that would work. Um, I had heard about diet culture, um, ’cause I, I listened to podcasts.
[00:04:35] I read articles, that type of thing. And a number of years ago, I kind of dabbled in it, but I, again, I would start and stop. I have a wonderful library of diet books. I have signed up for more programs than I care to remember. And I got to the stage that I just didn’t want to do this anymore, but I wasn’t sure what to do or how to do it.
[00:04:57] Kim: I think many of us can relate to that feeling. Right. Of knowing that dieting isn’t working. Like you say, you tried them all and you didn’t find success with any. Knowing that it’s not working, and yet wondering “well, what do I do next?” And so tell me a bit about your journey into the non diet world. Like what started to come across your, computer screen or your social media? Like what got you thinking that there was a different way.
[00:05:29] Jennifer: Uh, I think I, I found the books, uh, or the book about intuitive eating. Um, I had listened to some podcasts that Stephanie Dodier had put out. And I had heard about health at every size. I, um, And I sort of read the books and again, in my typical fashion, I read the books and thought that’s nice, but that’s a lot of work and sort of shied away from it.
[00:05:59] So it wasn’t a perfect easy fix.
[00:06:04] Kim: What attracted you to the non diet approach? Like what was the, what was the hope and possibility when you started thinking about that maybe dieting isn’t the answer?
[00:06:15] Jennifer: That I would get freedom from this constant day in day out having to assess what I’m eating, count something, whether it’s points or calories or, and, and bargain with myself that I would have a light breakfast to, so I could have a big lunch or I could party at the weekend and that type of thing. Yeah.
[00:06:38] Kim: Yeah. Freedom from all of that space that dieting was taking up in your brain. So you said that you dabbled in a little bit of the non diet approach.
[00:06:49] You started following a few different people, reading some articles, listening to some podcasts. Where was the struggle in making the switch to stopping dieting and taking on this health at every size non-diet approach?
[00:07:08] Jennifer: I think cause cause dieting was supposed to be the fix for everything. If I could just lose weight, everything would be perfect.
[00:07:18] Cause it didn’t matter what the problem was. The solution was to diet. Uh, and, and even now it’s still, I can go down that rabbit hole quite easily, but I catch myself now before I’m too far.
[00:07:32] Kim: Right. So the hope was. That weight loss would happen. Right. That was, that was the overarching goal, whether it was through dieting or through the non-diet approach, there was a hope of weight loss.
[00:07:44] Yes. Okay. And how did that keep you stuck?
[00:07:49] Jennifer: Because it it’s a never ending circle. It doesn’t work. Dieting does not work. And what dieting managed to do was just, um, blow up my self esteem. Okay. It would, you know, it, depending on how you felt, whether you lost weight or you didn’t lose weight or you cheated, or you didn’t cheat and I’m busy doing air quotes here so nobody can see me.
[00:08:14] Um, it just overcome it. Your whole life has just consumed. Um,
[00:08:21] Kim: how big was the fear of weight gain for you when you were considering adopting a non diet approach?
[00:08:28] Jennifer: That would be, that would definitely have been a big, a big part of it. Yep. And again, I’ll, I’ll be honest. Even now the thought of my weight increasing, still would concern me.
[00:08:40] But I have to, I kind of framed it in other ways. So it’s not such a, an issue.
[00:08:46] Kim: Yeah. And we’ll come back to that. Remind me to come back to that point. How you reframe that now, because I mean, I think that’s a, that’s a really common fear and it’s not like these things ever really go away. Right. But even with all of the work that we do that fear persists, but yet, remind me to come back to talk about how you’re managing that fear.
[00:09:07] So eventually you, you landed on my work and we began working together. What would you say was your, your biggest struggle at that moment? When we met, like you had been, you’d been gathering some information, you’d been dabbling in the non diet work and you were feeling pretty stuck. What was the biggest struggle at that point?
[00:09:29] Jennifer: It likely it was actually having to sit down and do the work because this time I had committed and I had promised myself I was going to do it. I said it was, I think I said it was my Christmas gift to myself, um, that I would actually sit and do this. So I had to sit down and I had to think and come up with answers to questions that I maybe didn’t want to ask myself.
[00:09:54] Uh,
[00:09:55] Kim: what was that like for you?
[00:09:57] Jennifer: It’s hard. Yeah, it was hard. I could find, I could find a dozen and one things to do instead. All of a sudden dishes needed washed, cupboards needed, cleaned any excuse to not have to sit down and think
[00:10:12] Kim: so. Do you think that was what kept you stuck in previous programs is that you didn’t have to do the thinking and because you weren’t working, one-to-one face-to-face with a coach, you could get away with that.
[00:10:24] Jennifer: Oh, for sure. Yeah. Yeah, because I didn’t have to answer to somebody and it’s not that I have to answer to you, but you won’t let me away with it. You’ll you’ll kind of hold my feet to the fire and say, okay, but where’s that coming from? And when I think I’ve answered you, you’ll ask me again. Okay. But where’s that coming from?
[00:10:45] And you make me dig deeper to actually figure out what it is that’s going on..
[00:10:50] Kim: Yeah. So can you do, can you think of an example of, um, a situation where I have encouraged you? I don’t want to say forced you, but encouraged you to dig deep.
[00:11:01] Jennifer: Uh, let me think. It’s, um, it could well be because generally it all stems down to worthiness and then knowing that you’re, you’re innately worthy, um, That if, if for example, I was to gain weight and I had to go up a size in clothes what that would mean, not just that it would mean I’d have to buy new clothes, but what would that mean about me and what would I think about that?
[00:11:31] How would, how do my core beliefs fit into that and digging beneath the surface to that, that sense of worthiness and, and, um, and not, uh, not being the perfect. Uh, person that I thought I would’ve been type of thing.
[00:11:46] Kim: Um, the fear, the fear of rejection, what people will think of you, what you think of yourself, if you have to do this.
[00:11:54] Yeah. Yeah. And I guess coming back to your previous point about the fear of weight gain, that that was a theme and in our coaching, right? Is that well, if I, if I practice intuitive eating and I really give myself permission to eat, what if I gain weight? Exactly. Yeah. And then, well, and then I would ask you, well, what does that mean about you?
[00:12:17] And you might say, well, it means I’m, I won’t be healthy. And what does that mean about you? And right. We just keep on digging and digging and digging. So what did you uncover about your beliefs about, well let’s pick health. What did you uncover about your beliefs about health? As we started digging into these issues,
[00:12:35] Jennifer: that weight is not synonymous with health that, uh, It’s the habits that I have on a daily basis that are going to be the indicator of my health going forward.
[00:12:49] It’s not a number on a scale, um, and whether you’re in a smaller body or a bigger body, you can still be healthy. It’s the healthy habits that are going to make the difference.
[00:13:01] Kim: And how did always tying health to weight and the focus on weight loss affect your consistency with those healthy habits.
[00:13:12] Jennifer: I wasn’t consistent at all.
[00:13:14] I would start things again, I’d start and stop. Exercise it was an all in or nothing. It had to be a, you know, um, I joined several gyms over the years. I’ve got, again, I’ve got a good DVD collection of different programs, but it was always, it couldn’t be, you would do it just once a week. It would have to be you with.
[00:13:35] I am going to do it every morning at six o’clock. I hate getting out of bed early in the morning, regardless of what I’m doing. But so, you know, you set yourself up for failure in a way.
[00:13:44] Kim: Yeah. I mean, forcing yourself to get out of bed at six in the morning, if you hate that and doing exercise that you don’t enjoy it, probably not going to last very long.
[00:13:52] Right. But this is, this is the trick that our brain plays on us when we’re fixated on weight loss is like, but I have to do these hateful things. Yeah. So when you can reframe that and know that its weight is not the same as health and health is a product of, well, health is complex. I don’t want to simplify it to just being a product of your habits.
[00:14:16] However, with that being the part of this that you can control, then what changes what’s available for you now?
[00:14:25] Jennifer: It’s more, anything I want is available. And I, I move to enjoy movement to move my body because it feels good. I am now asking my body what it needs on any given day. Yeah, I hear it saying rest then I that’s what I’m going to do.
[00:14:44] I’m going to rest or I’m going to stretch or I’m going to go for a walk or I might do, um, an aerobics type class. It just all depends. And there’s nothing off limits because I’m not in that tinier body that I figured was going to be perfect.
[00:15:03] Kim: Yeah. And you get to choose movement. That that feels good.
[00:15:07] Right? Like I know you’ve mentioned you have some, some pain, some mobility issues, and, and this is the thing I see all the time too, is that women will engage in hardcore exercise because they think they have to for weight loss, and then it hurts them.
[00:15:19] Jennifer: That’s right. And then the next day you can’t walk and then you’re never going to do that one again.
[00:15:25] Kim: So when weight loss is off the table and you’re moving as a form of self-care, then suddenly. You’re not so hard on yourself
[00:15:33] Jennifer: and it becomes enjoyable. It’s less of a chore. It’s something I’m doing because I enjoy doing it. And if today I don’t feel like doing that, but I still want to move then go for a walk instead.
[00:15:44] It’s, there’s, there’s lots of options available.
[00:15:47] Kim: Right. And what about in terms of your relationship to food? What did that look like before. Whether you were practicing intuitive eating or a diet of some sort, but with the hope that it would result in weight loss, how did your relationship to food look?
[00:16:04] Jennifer: There was always some sort of. Almost some sort of restriction going on in that, or it was good for labeling for good food, bad food, mental restriction, mental restriction. And I am, I am a self-confessed chocoholic. Um, so I would have chocolate hidden because it was bad food and you had to hide that. Um, and then when the day wasn’t going, the way I wanted it to, I would be looking to indulge and then overindulge, because it was forbidden food and was hidden.
[00:16:36] Kim: Hmm. So what’s changed now that you’re chasing health on your terms and giving yourself permission to eat
[00:16:47] Jennifer: well, nothing’s off the table, quite literally. Um, and, uh, one of the things was to have chocolate freely available, and if I feel I want it. Uh, to go and eat it. What I’m trying to do is not just mindlessly eat it, though.
[00:17:02] If I’m going to eat it, I’m going to enjoy it. And I’m going to sit down and enjoy it. But it means when I go out for meals, you’re not looking at the menu and thinking, okay, what’s low calorie. What? Oh, I can’t have that because there’s too much fat in that. Or I can’t have that because whatever reason. I have what I want, and enjoy it and feel no guilt after it. And then next day’s a new day and we do whatever we want tomorrow as well.
[00:17:28] Kim: Yeah. How does that feel to be able to make those decisions?
[00:17:32] Jennifer: It is really freeing. It’s amazing. The difference
[00:17:39] Kim: and shouldn’t, we all just be able to do. What we want without guilt, right? Like shouldn’t food be able to be enjoyed.
[00:17:48] Jennifer: It’s supposed to be enjoyable, like food, this for this fuel. Yes. You need it to fuel your body, but it shouldn’t be labeled good or bad. You know, if you have an opportunity to eat something, if it’s high, fat, high calorie, whatever, enjoy it. If it tastes good and if you take a bite and you don’t like it, well don’t eat it.,
[00:18:11] Kim: So what have you learned about yourself that, that gives you that ability to choose what you want and not have to abide by rules all the time
[00:18:24] Jennifer: that I am worthy. Regardless my weight, my, um, habits, anything like that? I am worthy of love. I am enough as I am right now and I can just live life everyday on life’s terms.
[00:18:41] Kim: Yeah. Amazing. You’re worthy of feeling good. And what about body trust? Like what about trusting in yourself to make good decisions?
[00:18:51] Jennifer: That’s it it’s I think it’s going to always be a work in progress. Um, on any given day, it can depend, is it a stressful day or not? Is it a good day? Um, and just sitting because for years I had quashed that little voice inside me that would tell me whether things were good about you. You don’t listen to it when you’re dieting, you’re, you’re going by somebody else’s game plan. And now that actually listened to my body and then to get your body to trust that when it tells you it wants something that that’s what you’re going to give it. Which I think is why initially when you’re eating, when you take the reins off and you allow yourself to have whatever.
[00:19:31] Yeah, you’re having more of the chocolates and the pastries and that type of thing, but then you do crave a nice salad or whatever it, all of those balance out over time,
[00:19:44] Kim: we talk about the pendulum swing, right. So when you’re first beginning, intuitive eating and giving yourself permission to eat. Yeah.
[00:19:50] You might have a lot of cravings for those previously forbidden foods, because you’ve been without them for so long and your body feels really depleted. Right. But when you have them and when you build up that trust in that permission that eventually your body knows what it needs to function at its best. And it’s yeah, you’re going to crave the salad.
[00:20:08] You’re getting to crave the fruits and vegetables. It’s going to be, I don’t want to use the word balanced, but the way that you eat is going to look a lot more balanced than this like binge and restrict cycle that you were previously on. Yeah. So let’s talk about body image. What have you learned about your relationship with your body?
[00:20:35] Jennifer: I have that again, it’s a work in progress, but I am, I’m trying to appreciate. See, I know a language is a big thing too. I try and appreciate my body for what it can do for me or what it has done for me. And, um, I, one of the, um, somewhere along the line, I had either listened to a podcast or read something about in the morning, whenever are.
[00:21:02] Your morning routine should be thanking every part of your body for what it’s it’s doing to you, your legs for letting you stand on them, your belly for carrying your kids, that type of thing. And by appreciating it, then your. It may not be body love that you end up with body neutrality, for sure that you’re just, you’re appreciating your body as the vessel that’s bringing, taking you through life and allowing you the experiences that you have.
[00:21:28] Kim: Yeah. Yeah. So how has that impacted your thoughts, especially in terms of that, the fear of weight gain that you had at the beginning, like having this more neutral approach about your body, what does that made available?
[00:21:45] Jennifer: That, um, my weight is going to be what it is at some point it will stabilize somewhere. Um, and that it’s the weight or the size of my body is not going to be the barrier for me doing anything. That I can still, it’s the strength that I have. It’s the flexibility that I have. It’s the mobility that I have. All those things are what lets me live life the way I want to live life.
[00:22:14] Not the weight, not that number on the scale. Yeah.
[00:22:18] Kim: Yeah. I love that. That’s so powerful. Now I know you said that it’s a work in progress and you’ve done a lot of work to transform this belief that losing weight is the answer to all of life’s problems. And every now and then those thoughts still pop in your brain.
[00:22:35] So what do you do now when those thoughts pop up?
[00:22:39] Jennifer: If it’s a really good day, I can just say don’t be so stupid and change direction. And off I go, if it’s one of those days where maybe there’s some thoughts in the back of my head, it can sit with me for awhile, but then I’ll, I’ll go through the, the analytical part of my brain will go 95% of people who lose weight regain it all in five years. The biggest guarantee of weight gain is to go on a diet. And I can talk, I kind of talk myself off the cliff. Um, .And, and really think, do I really want to count everything for the rest of my life? Do I really want to go through life like that? No, I don’t. And then that gets me back to where I was.
[00:23:24] Kim: Yeah. And, and knowing that you’ve experienced a whole lot of freedom around your relationship to food, your relationship to movement and your relationship to your body. So when those thoughts of dieting is going to solve all your problems pop up. Does that even feel true anymore?
[00:23:44] Jennifer: No. No, I can. I can catch it and, and, and realize that it isn’t true.
[00:23:48] That it’s just, it’s the safety, because that was. I guess my body always knew what to do. Because that was good old, reliable. The diet was always the fallback. Yeah. But then you discover that it’s not.
[00:24:03] Kim: Yeah. Yeah. I think a lot of times we turn to the diet or to the weight loss strategy as a means to feel in control of other areas of our life, where we feel like things aren’t going our way.
[00:24:15] Would you say that’s true for you?
[00:24:16] Jennifer: Very much. Yep. Yeah. If I can’t control anything else, I’ll control the food I’m eating. Yeah. Only then you don’t and you binge, and then you feel even more out of control than you are
[00:24:31] Kim: now. I know we talked about. Uh, some of the things in your life that you’d been putting on hold or not giving your attention to, or thinking that you could never have because of the size of your body.
[00:24:44] So let’s talk about some of those other things, like what’s become available to you now that you’ve done this healing work. What things do you now have the courage to, to jump into as a result of this work?
[00:24:59] Jennifer: I’m I’m more likely to be involved in things. I am more likely to, uh, you know, go play with the grandkids.
[00:25:07] And if I have to sit down and get back up again and run again, I can go and do that. Um, we go on vacation I’ll, you know, go on the walking tours and that type of thing without thinking about, you know, anybody’s looking at me, cause at the end of the day, people are more worried. Thinking that everybody’s looking at them.
[00:25:26] So, you know, everybody has the same concept that people are going to be looking at me, but no, we’re all just worried about ourselves. Um, I, I, you know, buy clothes that fit, not clothes that are a size smaller. And if I, if I just lose five pounds, I’ll get into them and, you know, then everything will be good to know.
[00:25:45] I’ll buy clothes that fit me. And it’s, it’s the waste of time that you spent it’s I can, if I want to, uh, Go on a hike, bike, whatever. I’ll go do it. Now. I’m even, it’s sort of, it’s freeing up space in my brain to think about other stuff. So now I’m actually contemplating retiring, which is that hasn’t been on the horizon for, for me at all.
[00:26:09] It wasn’t even something I would think about. Yeah.
[00:26:11] Kim: So that’s a new thought since you freed up all of this diet space in your brain. That’s right. So what is it that made the thought of retiring a possibility.
[00:26:26] Jennifer: I think it’s just opening yourself up to experiences and, and to that there’s, there’s way more to life. Than there’s, there’s so much wasted time on, on controlling what food intake is that, you know, as I go out and I get more actively involved in life, there’s that there’s more things to experience. And I want time to go and experience.
[00:26:48] Kim: Okay. So because you dropped dieting, you’ve been able to enjoy life at a whole other level that you hadn’t been before.
[00:26:55] And you want more of that?
[00:26:57] Jennifer: I do. Yes, I do. For sure. Because dieting just keeps you, you know, you spent so much time stewing about what you’re eating or what you’re not eating, what you’re wearing or what you can’t wear, what you’re doing, what you can’t do, that type of thing.
[00:27:15] Kim: Yeah. I mean, I know it can be easy to fall into a trap of regret for all the time wasted and lost in diet culture.
[00:27:24] But the reframe to that is what’s possible now. Like I have all of this life and all of this possibility ahead of me, what do I want to do with it?
[00:27:35] Jennifer: And it’s never too late.
[00:27:38] Kim: No, it never is. It never is. What’s been your biggest win. I know that’s a big question, but what’s been your biggest win from doing all of this work.
[00:27:49] Jennifer: Getting to know me, getting to know the real me underneath all the, the, you know, the barriers that I had put up and understanding where things came from, where. And it’s strange where, um, you know, you’ve been holding onto grievances or hurts from your childhood even, and that’s, what’s, what’s pushed you in this.
[00:28:17] Kim: That’s such a powerful point. I think so many of us fall into the trap of defining ourselves by our body. Like we don’t even stop to consider who we are at a soul level, who we are like in our essence, not just how we look or the things that we do or the hats that we wear. That’s pretty incredible. All right.
[00:28:41] Well, what’s next for you?
[00:28:45] Jennifer: What’s next? I’m working on, I’m going back to the intuitive eating piece and learning some more about it. Um, and intuitive eating and gentle nutrition. But with, without the diet mindset, which is, is good. Yeah.
[00:29:01] Kim: It’s different. Right. When you are trying intuitive eating with the intention of weight loss, it kind of stops you from really taking it on.
[00:29:10] Jennifer: Yes. Yes it does. And then learning about the language that we use when we talk to ourselves. Hmm. It’s um, and you caught me at this, uh, one of our last sessions was when I said, I thought I had it all together and you stopped me on that and said, but why would you think that you had to have it altogether?
[00:29:33] Yeah. And, and you don’t. I think you’ve got to realize it’s a work in progress and it will be a work in progress.
[00:29:40] Kim: Yeah. As long as we’re here on earth, we’re learning and we’re growing. And just because we have overcome a challenge or a limiting belief doesn’t mean that we’ve arrived. Right? Like these things still come up, but we know how to get through it.
[00:29:53] We know how to manage our mind and move on. But yeah, there is no end point. No. No. Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, you said about, um, looking at the language you use, like to yourself. So what’s your goal there? How do you want to speak to yourself moving forward ?.
[00:30:13] Jennifer: With love and respect for sure. Um, I’m sort of trying to catch when I say I can’t do something or I won’t be able to do that, or I shouldn’t do that.
[00:30:25] Or you say, I would love to do that, but. You’re trying to take all those catch how often you say it to yourself. Yeah. And, and say, you know, change the way I phrase something. Not that I can’t do it. I may not be able to do it right now, but that doesn’t mean to say, I can’t learn how to do it or progress to that level.
[00:30:49] Kim: If it’s even a priority for you. Right. And that’s where a lot of the should-ing comes in is like, well, I should do that, but I can’t. Well, do you even want to,
[00:30:58] Jennifer: yeah. That you don’t actually have to,
[00:31:01] Kim: you get to choose and then yeah. And if something is, if it’s something that you want, you can take steps to get there.
[00:31:08] You have a very empowered mindset. I love it.
[00:31:12] Jennifer: It’s I it’s a work again. It’s a work in progress, but it’s developing and it’s, it’s freeing and it’s, it’s exciting whenever you start to feel like that. Yeah.
[00:31:23] Kim: Yeah. I know in our last session we were talking about. Uh, freedom. Right. And I think as long as we’ve been working together, the idea of feeling free from diet culture, feeling free to eat what you want, free to move in, the ways that you want free from all of the thoughts in your brain.
[00:31:42] That like that was the overarching goal. And. It seems like this is not just you and it’s not just me, lots of us do this. We think that what we want is way out there in the future. And that if we just do all of the things, like if we, maybe if we diet and we lose the weight, the freedom will happen. Or like we it’s all this future thinking.
[00:32:03] But what you realized in that moment is that that freedom is available to you right now.
[00:32:09] Jennifer: Yep. Very much so. You have to do the work to get there. That’s for sure. And that was what was missing the whole time. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:32:20] Kim: Okay. Well, this is, this is really powerful. And I have said this to you, lots of times in your sessions, and I’m going to say it again here for the rest of the world to hear is that you, I mean, maybe you resisted doing the work for a long time, but you show up and you do the work very well, every time. That you are willing, you are willing to go deep and as such, you’ve experienced just a, I mean, an amazing transformation and all this freedom that you wanted. You’ve got it now. It’s so exciting. So
[00:32:54] Jennifer: exciting.
[00:32:56] Kim: Nobody can nobody can. Yeah. All right. Well, is there anything else that you want to share before we wrap up today, Jennifer?
[00:33:06] Jennifer: Um, I think what I want people to realize is that if you’ve been, if you’ve been hesitant about having one-to-one coaching, that it’s something you really should consider because until I’ve actually been involved in it and doing it, I hadn’t realized how valuable it was and, um, you know, holding my feet to the fire is one way to put it.
[00:33:28] But being able to, to delve deeper than you might want to on your own has been so valuable. Yeah. I’d highly recommend it. Yeah.
[00:33:40] Kim: I mean, I’m a big proponent. I mean, I have a coach too, right? Like we all need somebody to see those blind spots that we can’t see for ourselves. Right. And we, like, we gather information and we can be really intelligent and we can know all of the right things to do.
[00:33:58] Putting it to work and really internalizing, embodying that knowledge for ourselves. I mean, sometimes that just takes having that extra person to support you and I’ve been really thankful to be that person for you.
[00:34:10] Jennifer: Well, thank you.
[00:34:13] Kim: All right. Well, we’ll wrap up on that note. Thank you so much for coming on the show today, Jennifer,
[00:34:18] Jennifer: you are very welcome.
